Casting The First Stone
Average customer rating: 4.5 out of 5 stars
  • I'll Pass On The Next One
  • A Short Story Novel, Yes, Yes
  • Curtis Curtis Curtis!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Drama in the Church
  • Mr. Curtis Black
Casting The First Stone
Kimberla Lawson Roby
Manufacturer: Kensington
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

ContemporaryContemporary | General | Literature & Fiction | Subjects | Books
LiteraryLiterary | General | Literature & Fiction | Subjects | Books
Roby, Kimberla LawsonRoby, Kimberla Lawson | African American | United States | World Literature | Literature & Fiction | Subjects | Books
ContemporaryContemporary | General | Literature & Fiction | 4-for-3 Books Store | Stores | Books
LiteraryLiterary | General | Literature & Fiction | 4-for-3 Books Store | Stores | Books
African AmericanAfrican American | United States | World Literature | Literature & Fiction | 4-for-3 Books Store | Stores | Books
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ASIN: 0758201796

Book Description

Tanya Black had deeply believed in her husband's call to preach. And when he asked her to marry him she'd felt blessed to be part of such a future. Sitting in the second row of his Chicago church only a few years later, she is unable to bear listening to his sermons or understand what happened to their shared dream.

Blackboard bestselling author Kimberla Lawson Roby takes on one of the most controversial issues in America: corruption and temptation within church leadership. An electrifying read, CASTING THE FIRST STONE goes behind the scenes of a fictional Chicago church and its struggle to keep faith and commitment alive in the face of ambition.

This is the third novel of this author whose previous books have won her dedicated fans and a connection to readers coast-to-coast. Her works bring to life Black women whose lives are complex with jobs, children, spouses and lovers - in short the kind of lives her readers themselves live. Giving voice to the women who share their concerns with her has always been Roby's aim in each novel she has written.

CASTING THE FIRST STONE listens in on the heart of a woman torn between loving who her husband was and hating who he has become. Roby weaves a fast-paced story about faith's challenges in a world made up of material desires and other physical temptations. Taken right from the headlines, Roby's cautionary tale looks at the other side of church politics and the emotional toll it takes.

Customer Reviews:

2 out of 5 stars I'll Pass On The Next One.......2007-07-17

This was an okay read. It took me a long time to finish this book because in certain spots the book was downright boring. I really got tired of Tanya going back and forth on the seesaw trying to decide if she should stay or leave Curtis. And the whole idea of staying in a marriage where the husband lies & disrespects you daily and you know he's cheating but you choose to stay for the sake of your daughter was too much for me to comprehend (I lost interest at that point). Curtis was a terrible person and demonstrated many of the negative attributes associated with "Black" churches. This one was okay, not interested in reading the sequels

5 out of 5 stars A Short Story Novel, Yes, Yes.......2007-07-08

300Pgs - The Rev. Curtis Black is introduced. You have no other choice but to fall in Love with him. He is successful, handsome, tall, smart and a God fearing Pastor or so we imagine from the story. His family is also very adorable.

This story is a high-speed heartwarming drama that you will want to finish before you put down!

I strongly recommend this book. It was truly a great read.

5 out of 5 stars Curtis Curtis Curtis!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.......2007-05-07

This was an excellent book very well written and not a boring moment!! This is the first time I have read one of Mrs.Roby's book and I must say I was not disappointed! Curtis Black was something else I think there is a Pastor like him in every big city!! You will enjoy this book!!

4 out of 5 stars Drama in the Church.......2007-04-10

Tanya Black has everything a woman could want: a fulfilling career, a beautiful daughter, an elegant home, and a handsome, charismatic husband who is pastor at a prominent Baptist church. And yet, none of it can hide the growing turbulence in her marriage.

Her husband Curtis's remoteness, his selfisheness where she and their daughter are concerned, and his corruption when it comes to the church are making Tanya doubt what she once cherished. How can she respect a man who's preaching simple values while he's grabbing money and power behind the scenes?

Then Curtis goes too far, and Tanya's confronted with the worst betrayal a woman can face. Plunged into a bittersweet journey of discovery, she suddenly finds herself learning painful new lessons about love, loyalty, and sensual temptation...and discovering the wisdom to celebrate the victories that are hers alone.

Casting the First Stone started off with a bang. The way Curtis treated his wife infuriated me. I didn't care for Curtis and his deceptive ways, because he reminded me of some preachers I've encountered...living a double life. While reading Casting the First Stone, I thought Tanya should've left her poor excuse for a husband a long time ago. Unfortunately, that took a while to happen. I understand the frustration of some of the readers about that, but I think Tanya waited because the decision to leave a marriage is a tough one--regardless of the circumstances. I think she stuck around for appearances as well as insecurities. I enjoyed this book because justice was served. I recommend this book.

5 out of 5 stars Mr. Curtis Black.......2007-03-31

Will the real Curtis Black please stand up! I had never heard of all this type of church drama in real life but apparently other viewers had. I was so disappointed with Curtis. If there is ever a reason a person had any doubts about finding a church home and a great pastor, please don't read this book. If you can take this book as just a fictional, and entertaining reward then read it. It's an awesome storyline about a preacher falling short of his glory. Curtis has a beautiful and faithful wife but chose to live on the edge with woman and money. The congregation found out in an odd way but in the end Curtis loses his wife but gained a powerful lesson after transforming his life from worldly actions. AWESOME!!!!
Casting the First Stone
Average customer rating: Not rated
    Casting the First Stone

    Manufacturer: Recorded Books
    ProductGroup: Book
    Binding: Audio Cassette
    ASIN: 0788753118

    Product Description

    Kimberla Lawson Roby tells the story of Tanya Black, an honest, faithful, independent woman who is struggling to come to terms with her failing marriage. The Black household is swiftly deteriorating. Frustrated and angry at her prosperous preacher husbands obvious infidelities, Tanya cannot believe the man she once loved has been replaced by this pathological liar obsessed with material wealth. But Tanya loves their daughter Alicia and is reluctant to divorce Curtis--until a videotape surfaces that allows Tanya and Alicia a new chance at happiness. Caroline Clay narrates this Blackboard Fiction Book of the Year--expertly delivering every nuance of Tanyas tension, regret and hope for new beginnings.
    Casting the First Stone: The Hypocrisy of Religious Fundamentalism and Its Threat to Society
    Average customer rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    • Fairly perceptive critique
    Casting the First Stone: The Hypocrisy of Religious Fundamentalism and Its Threat to Society
    R. A. Gilbert
    Manufacturer: Element Books
    ProductGroup: Book
    Binding: Paperback

    GeneralGeneral | Theology | Reference | Christianity | Religion & Spirituality | Subjects | Books
    GeneralGeneral | Church History | Christianity | Religion & Spirituality | Subjects | Books
    FundamentalismFundamentalism | Theology | Christianity | Religion & Spirituality | Subjects | Books
    GeneralGeneral | Religion & Spirituality | Subjects | Books
    GeneralGeneral | Occult | Religion & Spirituality | Subjects | Books
    GeneralGeneral | Theology | Religious Studies | Religion & Spirituality | Subjects | Books
    ASIN: 1852303670

    Customer Reviews:

    3 out of 5 stars Fairly perceptive critique.......2002-10-31

    RA Gilbert's book claims to be a "startling expose". It is hardly exciting or novel enough to qualify for such an overexaggerated description. Nor does it particularly live up to its title - it doesn't really say a great deal about hypocrisy as such (though it might be inferred), and by the author's own admission it critiques the behaviour of only one segment (albeit a large one, perhaps) of (Protestant) fundamentalism. It is, however, generally insightful and accurate.

    The main focus of Gilbert's book is on the attitude demonstrated by many fundamentalist Christians towards other religions and groups, but mostly practitioners of the (notoriously difficult-to-define) "New Age" and "occult". He details practices and arguments with which I am well acquainted: I spent most of my Christian life in a milieu where Christians felt it their duty to picket psychic fairs, to publicly oppose any expression of other religions, faiths or spiritual beliefs (usually in the belief that government were morally bound to take their side), and to be among the foremost of those propogating any one of endless myths and sensational fabrications about Satanism and witchcraft. Gilbert competently assails the legends and folklore that make up fundamentalist opposition to "demonic forces". In this I am with him.

    He is noticeably sympathetic to New Age practices, and gives short shrift to skeptics who deny such things on a scientific basis. This is perhaps the fatal blow to his critique: He gives alternative health and spirituality a credibility that would make skeptics wince, and this enthusiasm frequently sends him off on a tangent, with criticisms of newspapers and medical doctors (among others) that take him somewhat away from his original "expose" of fundamentalism. This line of attack detracts from his central thesis and, I fear, is rather detrimental to his overall credibility, at least in the eyes of some.

    Nevertheless, I wish all fundamentalists would read this and learn from it. Perhaps no other aspect of fundamentalism has annoyed me so much as the gullibility demonstrated in the immediate swallowing of every morsel of gossip that might possibly provide useful ammunition against "the enemy". Unfortunately for all of us, rebukes like Gilbert's tend to fall on deaf ears.
    Casting the first stone: A Christian approach to victims and the illusion of sinlessness
    Average customer rating: Not rated
      Casting the first stone: A Christian approach to victims and the illusion of sinlessness
      Elizabeth Ann Huskey
      ProductGroup: Book
      Binding: Unknown Binding

      Domestic ViolenceDomestic Violence | Abuse & Self Defense | Mental Health | Health, Mind & Body | Subjects | Books
      GeneralGeneral | Psychology & Counseling | Health, Mind & Body | Subjects | Books
      GeneralGeneral | Theology | Christianity | Religion & Spirituality | Subjects | Books
      ASIN: B0006PBN4G

      Margery Allingham Omnibus: Includes Sweet Danger, The Case of the Late Pig, The Tiger in the Smoke
      Average customer rating: Not rated
        Margery Allingham Omnibus: Includes Sweet Danger, The Case of the Late Pig, The Tiger in the Smoke
        Margery Allingham
        Manufacturer: Vintage Books
        ProductGroup: Book
        Binding: Paperback

        GeneralGeneral | Mystery | Mystery & Thrillers | Subjects | Books
        Allingham, MargeryAllingham, Margery | ( A ) | Authors, A-Z | Mystery & Thrillers | Subjects | Books
        GeneralGeneral | Mystery & Thrillers | Subjects | Books
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        ASIN: 0099503727
        Release Date: 2006-10-31
        The Tiger in the Smoke
        Average customer rating: 4 out of 5 stars
        • The Science of Luck
        • Excellent mystery/thriller
        • Havoc in London
        • "Tiger" begging for a film remake! Challenges Grishom books
        • Miasma
        The Tiger in the Smoke
        Margery Allingham
        Manufacturer: Carroll & Graf Publishers
        ProductGroup: Book
        Binding: Mass Market Paperback

        GeneralGeneral | Mystery | Mystery & Thrillers | Subjects | Books
        Allingham, MargeryAllingham, Margery | ( A ) | Authors, A-Z | Mystery & Thrillers | Subjects | Books
        GeneralGeneral | Mystery & Thrillers | Subjects | Books
        ASIN: 0786707194

        Book Description

        Meg Elginbrodde's wedding plans to millionaire Geoffrey Levett stop dead when she begins receiving snapshots of a man who could be her husband-if he hadn't been killed at war five years before. When Meg's old friend, the charming and erudite Albert Campion, takes on this case of perplexing identity, it takes him on a spine-chilling manhunt in London's sinister underworld.

        Customer Reviews:

        5 out of 5 stars The Science of Luck.......2006-12-18

        This is one of the most interesting books I have ever read. I just finished reading it for the third time. Each time I read it I am fascinated by the author's ability to capture and express an almost inexpressible truth of the way life works. The main character, Havoc, calls it *the Science of Luck*. Look to this book for more than the thrilling read it is.

        4 out of 5 stars Excellent mystery/thriller.......2006-01-09

        It's been a while since I read it -I thoroughly enjoyed this book (much better than that overrated Da Vinci code). Some reviewers inferred that the villian was not evil enough (a bit weak by lofty contemporary standards of evil villainry) but I thought this made the book stronger. It displays a vulnerable, human side to that particular character, brought about via a brief scene where the heroine recalls an incident from childhood involving both herself and the said villian. The character is strengthened by this and made less arch and less caricature as a result. I very much like the novels of Charles Dickens so I really don't mind a story hinging on incredible coincidence, just as long as it's handled deftly, which this is. Well worth the effort of reading it. I'm going to read it again!

        4 out of 5 stars Havoc in London.......2004-09-28

        This is one of the authors better novels in my opinion, more thriller than who dunnit as other reviewers have said, but non the worse for that. The pace of the book is good moving you on through the pages and the story which I won't divulge keeps you interested all the way through.

        In today's world the characters are a little hard to swallow, Albert Campion the hero is a gentleman detective with no apparent source of income, Lugg the ex con manservant is corny, the evil Jack Havoc doesn't come across as especially evil by todays standards and Meg the heroine is a tad pathetic although she is supposed to be a modern woman. The setting, a dank and fog bound London is also a little trite, but makes some of the twists and turns in the plot more believable.

        That said if like me you enjoy the period and can mentally get in tune with the values and society of the time it's a really fun book to read. I am a sucker for the twenties through to the end of the fifties and could read books like this one after the other.

        I agree with the reviewer who felt it would make a good movie, my only condition is that it would have to be in black and white.

        5 out of 5 stars "Tiger" begging for a film remake! Challenges Grishom books.......2004-07-24

        For excellent plot summaries, read the longer reviews in this string. I won't rehash what others have said so well...

        Allingham does in this book what Sayers and sometimes Christie did. They take a break from routine or just lighthearted mysteries & get a bit (dare I say) theological.

        But don't get scared off.
        The heart of good drama is...meaningful conflict.

        And the theological concept from Judaism/Christianity
        ...is the war between good versus evil---
        ...personified in Canon Avril (I know his "kin"--those who handwrestle evil regularly)
        .......and in "Havoc". Can't tell too much here to give "Havoc" away.

        If you are a real postmodern & laugh at the idea of evil, be thrilled by a retro book like this one nonetheless.

        This story just "itches" to be remade...as a "period" thriller with British consultants who can get the post World War II London right.

        3 out of 5 stars Miasma.......2003-09-23

        Despite the blurb and critical praise, this late novel is really no more than a thriller, not a "crime novel." As a thriller, it is quite successful, with some notably tense scenes in the London fog, although the finish on the French cliffs makes very little impact, and the plot, with its mixture of albinos, hunchbacks and dwarves, psychopathic ex-Commandos, saintly canons and buried treasure, is preposterous in the extreme. As a novel, it is less successful. Jack Havoc never comes across as the truly wicked man all the other character say he is, and the famous scene in the church is grossly over-rated. Thus, a rather pretentious return to the author's early `plum pudding' approach combined with her late style, which is often very good but equally often requires close and careful reading to avoid headache (particularly in the scenes with the ghastly ex-service men).
        The Tiger in The Smoke
        Average customer rating: Not rated
          The Tiger in The Smoke

          Manufacturer: Carroll & Graf Publishers, Inc.
          ProductGroup: Book
          Binding: Hardcover
          ASIN: 0739403133
          The Tiger In The Smoke
          Average customer rating: Not rated
            The Tiger In The Smoke
            Margery ALLINGHAM
            Manufacturer: Dell Publications
            ProductGroup: Book
            Binding: Paperback

            Allingham, MargeryAllingham, Margery | ( A ) | Authors, A-Z | Mystery & Thrillers | Subjects | Books
            ASIN: B000HS6L4Y

            Product Description

            "The Tiger was that rarity, a genuinely wicked man... The Smoke was the chiiling London fog through which this ruthless criminal moved..."
            The Tiger in the Smoke
            Average customer rating: Not rated
              The Tiger in the Smoke

              Manufacturer: Manor Books
              ProductGroup: Book
              Binding: Mass Market Paperback

              Allingham, MargeryAllingham, Margery | ( A ) | Authors, A-Z | Mystery & Thrillers | Subjects | Books
              ASIN: B000BKKC9I

              Product Description

              Myster/Thriller in the "Albert Campion" Mystery Series.
              Tiger in the Smoke (The Best Mysteries of All Time)
              Average customer rating: Not rated
                Tiger in the Smoke (The Best Mysteries of All Time)
                Margery Allingham
                Manufacturer: Impress
                ProductGroup: Book
                Binding: Hardcover

                Allingham, MargeryAllingham, Margery | ( A ) | Authors, A-Z | Mystery & Thrillers | Subjects | Books
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                1. Coroner's Pidgin Coroner's Pidgin

                ASIN: B000K8DLNK
                The Tiger In The Smoke
                Average customer rating: Not rated
                  The Tiger In The Smoke
                  Margery Allingham
                  Manufacturer: Penguin
                  ProductGroup: Book
                  Binding: Paperback
                  ASIN: B000UIDEXC
                  The Tiger in The Smoke
                  Average customer rating: Not rated
                    The Tiger in The Smoke

                    Manufacturer: Doubleday
                    ProductGroup: Book
                    Binding: Hardcover
                    ASIN: B000H0BKQG
                    The Tiger In The Smoke
                    Average customer rating: Not rated
                      The Tiger In The Smoke
                      Margery Allingham
                      Manufacturer: The Reprint Society
                      ProductGroup: Book
                      Binding: Hardcover
                      ASIN: B000HHFLI2
                      The Tiger in the Smoke
                      Average customer rating: Not rated
                        The Tiger in the Smoke
                        Margery Allingham
                        Manufacturer: Doubleday & Company
                        ProductGroup: Book
                        Binding: Hardcover
                        ASIN: B000OFNAS0

                        Predator & Prey: Werewolf (Vampire: The Masquerade Predator & Prey)
                        Average customer rating: 3.5 out of 5 stars
                        • Descent story
                        • Solid Book, Terrible Spelling
                        • Odd series...
                        • Good - Up to a Point
                        • Must read for Werewolf fans!
                        Predator & Prey: Werewolf (Vampire: The Masquerade Predator & Prey)

                        Manufacturer: White Wolf Publishing
                        ProductGroup: Book
                        Binding: Paperback

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                        ASIN: 1565049713

                        Book Description

                        Sickness gnaws at the land. The stream runs black with corruption. Black Rindle, child of forbidden union, is outcast among Garou and humans alike. Why then have the spirits chosen him for a special purpose, when they turn a deaf ear to all others?

                        Kaitlin has fled the city, fled the undead horrors that walk the streets there, in favor of the solitude-and crippling loneliness-of the wilds. But before she can come to terms with the supernatural creatures that seem determined to draw her back into their world, she must reclaim her place among humanity. Will the mysterious and violent stranger who crosses her path help her balance atop the precipice between the worlds, or will he push her over the edge?

                        Customer Reviews:

                        4 out of 5 stars Descent story.......2003-06-15

                        Predator & Prey: Werewolf was a decent story, about a Metis werewolf and a newly awakened hunter. While the plot was a little thin, the way in which both characters come to terms with their differences and in the end rely on each other to overcome the odds makes for a good story. However, it did end rather abruptly, which is a course do to the fact that there was to be a sequal. I would recommend this book to anyone who wishes to see a hunter through the eyes of a werewolf and a werewolf through the eyes of a hunter.

                        4 out of 5 stars Solid Book, Terrible Spelling.......2002-07-08

                        Thoroughly enjoyable and consistent work from White Wolf's best writer. The story is small and focused mainly on two characters, each at the crossroad of major decisions in their lives. I loved how the action is paced throughout, lending more time to building characters and raising the stakes. The chapter with the farm attack was incredible and quite shocking, showing the massive power and stamina of the garou. My only real problems with the novel are that I wish it had more of a conclusion and that the copy editor would do their job and fix all the spelling and punctuation mistakes.

                        3 out of 5 stars Odd series..........2001-09-04

                        I've read all three books (and the "Inherit the Earth" anthology) so far. The story deals with hunters only every other book (except this one, and then only marginally), but there's definetly an overall arc -- there are events mentioned in this book and the last one that occur in the first novel.

                        The second book tells the tale of a new hunter and how he copes with that fact -- it's great. This one has the supporting character as a hunter but a) she doesn't know what she is, b) she sees nothing but Garou, and c) deals exclusively with a Garou sept.

                        3 out of 5 stars Good - Up to a Point.......2001-07-20

                        Kaitlin, a young black woman, has fled from the pain of her ability to perceive the world of the monsters that surrounds her. Originally from around Detroit she has moved to a small northern town. Unsuspectingly she discovers that her neighbor, a small town bar, is a hangout for werewolves. Thus forcing her to confront the very issues she was trying to avoid.

                        Black Rindle is the metis werewolf that Kaitlin spotted after a kill. He is a child of a forbidden relationship between two werewolves, and bears a hunchback as the brand of his parentage. Metis are normally killed at birth, and the other Garou in his sept see his deformity as a mark of shame. To them, Black Rindle is a barely tolerated outcast, rejected by his father, and blamed for the illness and death of his mother. Browbeaten since birth, Rindle has internalized everyone's opinion of himself and has become a drifter and an alcoholic.

                        Kaitlin, terrorized by the appearance of Black Rindle, manages to overcome her fear of him when she finds his broken body by the road. Rindle had been set upon by one of his sept brothers, EveSong, and left to suffer. Kaitlin brings Rindle to her home and helps him to recover. A thorny and difficult relationship forms between them. When Kaitlin lands a job as a local waste disposal site Black Rindle smells a taint lingering about her. A sure sign of the Wyrm. When they discover that the taint is coming from a laboratory at the hazardous waste repository Rindle realizes that he must turn his life around. He is an Ahroun, a warrior, and is duty bound to fight any manifestation of the Wyrm. He must arouse the sept and prepare for battle.

                        This series was originally intended to illuminate the role of the Hunters, new characters in the World of Darkness. With this, the third in the series, I am beginning to suspect that the focus of the series is elsewhere. While Kaitlin, the hunter of the tale, has a prominent role, it is trivial compared to that of Black Rindle. The story says almost nothing about the hunters, although it provides a wealth of information about werewolves. Nor is Kaitlin particularly sympathetic. She can barely control here cowardice, and often lashes out in paranoid anger. This is a far cry from the Hunters as described in Andrew Bates' "Heralds of the Storm."

                        Gherbod Flemming, as usual, manages to make the plot work and keep the reader's interest up, despite the flawed characterizations. Unfortunately something inexplicable happens at the end of the novel. Actually the end never really happens. Having set the scene for what should be a titanic struggle with the Wyrm, and a growing relationship between Black Rindle and Kaitlin, Flemming suddenly abandons the tale in midstream. The entire tale is left hanging, apparently to make space for promotional material for a new series. This ruins this story, makes me wonder if this series is doomed to mediocrity, and certainly does not make me interested in the new series. I am tempted to suggest that Flemming abandon the White Wolf label and strike out on his own. Unfortunately that would deal too severe a blow to the World of Darkness game world. It would be unfair to punish so many gamers for the sins of their publisher.

                        5 out of 5 stars Must read for Werewolf fans!.......2001-06-24

                        This is a great book if you're a Werewolf gamer, and even if not. The inside on werewolf tribal life is really great and can be a lot of help to anyone who needs to get a first hand on how the pecking order of the clan goes. It's also a great story, the characters draw you in with things you can relate to if you were in their situation, and the details are brutal but real life. (well real life to werewolf) But any Werewolf fan should read this, it's well worth the time.
                        WHEN WILL YOU RAGE - Werewolf: The Apocalypse Anthology - The World of Darkness: Waters of Lethe; Coyote Full Moon; Sheep in Wolf's Clothing; Transitions; Fang of the Wolf; Hunter's Blues; Bye Bye Club; Wolf Trap; Predator and Prey; Lone Werewolf; Shards
                        Average customer rating: Not rated
                          WHEN WILL YOU RAGE - Werewolf: The Apocalypse Anthology - The World of Darkness: Waters of Lethe; Coyote Full Moon; Sheep in Wolf's Clothing; Transitions; Fang of the Wolf; Hunter's Blues; Bye Bye Club; Wolf Trap; Predator and Prey; Lone Werewolf; Shards
                          Stewart (editor) (Bill Bridges; Sam Chupp; Vincent Courtney; Nigel D. Findley; Owl Goingback; Scott Ciencin; Ray Winniger; Richard Lee Byers; David Chart; Lois Tilton; Phil Brucate; Thomas Kane; Scott Urban; Edo van Belkom; James A. Moore) Wieck
                          Manufacturer: White Wolf Publishing
                          ProductGroup: Book
                          Binding: Paperback
                          ASIN: B000T5AR72

                          Should We Stay Together?
                          Average customer rating: 3.5 out of 5 stars
                          • If Only I'd Known This Earlier!
                          • Who Doesn't Know This Stuff, Already?
                          • Great book for Gen Xers in love
                          • Finally - a useful book on relationships!
                          Should We Stay Together?
                          Jeffry H. Larson
                          Manufacturer: Jossey-Bass
                          ProductGroup: Book
                          Binding: Paperback

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                          ASIN: 0787951447

                          Amazon.com

                          Falling in love is the easy part; finding a truly compatible mate takes know-how. Drawing from a 10-year study of premarital characteristics that predict later marital satisfaction, author Jeffry H. Larson presents an excellent resource for couples considering marriage. Opening chapters debunk the many myths associated with happy relationships, everything from searching for soul mates to obeying the whims of the heart. Larson points to three key factors that affect all partnerships: contexts (each person's background), individual traits, and couple traits; he then shows how similarities and differences in each category lead to success or failure in marriage. By far the most intriguing aspect of this combination textbook and workbook is its series of checklists, discussion questions, and short tests designed for assessing one's relationship. Working alone or with their partners, readers can rather quickly determine the potential long-term satisfaction of their current relationships, based on the 24 key characteristics outlined in Larson's Relationship Evaluation (RELATE) questionnaire. Brief questions regarding similarity of values, communication skills, and conflict response patterns receive points that correspond to an evaluation scale. Larson concludes each exercise with plenty of clear, descriptive support material so participants can better interpret their test scores. For those who uncover a few bumps in their RELATE triangle, a final chapter offers an abundance of self-help and couples' therapy books, tapes, and workshops. --Liane Thomas

                          Book Description

                          The fact is, some couples need more time to mature, some need to work through specific issues, and some should never be together. But how do you know? What factors add up to success-or failure-in a relationship? Author Jeffry Larson knows; in fact, he knows a lot about what predicts a happy marriage. Based on Larson's twenty-plus years of research and experience in marriage and family therapy, Should We Stay Together?debunks many time-honored myths as it provides couples with the tools they need to make better decisions and thoroughly explore every aspect of their relationship. From individual characteristics, idiosyncratic family histories, unresolved conflicts and needs, and combined strengths and weaknesses, this step-by-step scientific method for relationship evaluation-based on the highly accurate RELATE premarital assessment questionnaire-will help couples understand the specific traits that predict a satisfying-or disastrous-relationship.

                          Customer Reviews:

                          4 out of 5 stars If Only I'd Known This Earlier!.......2003-03-25

                          I was very impressed with the book, "Should We Stay Together" by Mr. Larson which is bascially a summary of all his research gained from testing of his RELATE Premarital Questionnaire. As a result sometimes the read can get bogged down in how this is just that, and lead you to say can you just get to the point. Overall it was a great source of informaiton, especially the questions that you should answer yourself and with your partner. I know it made me realize a few things about my partner I didn't know before. It uses a triangular method that seems straight forward enough, but there's more to it than you'd think! It leaves nothing to chance, and makes you question those things hidden in your closet and your partners'to give you a real picture of whether or not your relationship should go on, is worth saving, or should be dissolved ASAP.

                          3 out of 5 stars Who Doesn't Know This Stuff, Already?.......2000-08-22

                          I found this book to be easy reading. Most of the research discussed comes as little surprise. It is quite obvious to this reader that disagreements over key issues such as whether or not to have children, the wife's role in the marriage, premarital sex, and so on, would be a compelling arguement not to get married. I found myself skipping over many of the tests because my partner and I have already discussed the issues presented and I didn't need to know where he stood on them or vice versa.

                          Anyone who would have the good sense to question whether or not they should make a lifetime committment to their partner would have the common sense to know that the issues brought forth in this book are important. For everyone else - the folks who marry with their eyes closed - this book would definately be a good guide.

                          This book is a worthwhile read if you have trouble broaching personal issues with your mate. Many of the subjects discussed could be considered controversial in some relationships. My boyfriend, an easy-going guy with an open minded approach to our relationship, thought the idea of cosmo-like tests to see if we were meant for eachother was a little lame. He played along :)

                          3 out of 5 stars Great book for Gen Xers in love.......2000-08-04

                          This is an excellent book for those ready to take the premature plunge under the age of 30. However, those of us over 30 may not find his advice applicable (i.e. At 38, it's difficult to find individuals that have NOT had multiple sex partners.)

                          An easy read, this book focuses on the many issues that should be dealt with before making a life altering decision. I would highly recommend this to my younger brother.

                          4 out of 5 stars Finally - a useful book on relationships!.......2000-07-26

                          This is an amazingly easy to read book - it also provides analytical, well researched information on a problem that a lot of us struggle with - finding the right spouse.

                          I personally don't read many self-help books and get turned off by test-your-relationship quizzes, but surprisingly this book does a very good job of putting across well researched ideas about premarital indications for a good marriage. It seems to be based on solid research done by social scientists. I like the way the author potrays the book as the "Consumer Reports" for marriage preparation.

                          The part I liked best was the explanation of myths about marriage -some of them were common sense, but others were interesting revelations that can potentially help you see hidden shades of your relationship.

                          On the flip side, maybe there were too many quizzes and the author seems to make a big deal about premarital counselling, seeking the experts, etc. But, for a book on relationships, Jeffrey Larson provides a lot of useful information that one could use to choose a better spouse.

                          Overall, for those of us that like to give ourselves a better than even chance at a successful marriage - this is a $20 well spent.

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